The plain, 'inexpensive' reality
Mark Pavilons

I often worry that I can't provide everything my family needs.

There are nights I lay awake and I'm sometimes reduced to tears, fearing the worst.

There's no question we're living in interesting, although expensive times. When my children go to college or university, we'd better be prepared. While we have education savings plans for all three, the amount they will generate over the next decade will only scratch the surface of future tuition costs.

I want them to have the education they need to take on the "brave new world." I want them to excel and thrive and succeed. I want them to not only have dreams, but achieve them.

I guess all parents hope for these very things. But planning for them and getting the job done are key.

Yes, it will be expensive to give our kids a decent education in the years to come. Heck, even high school may become a burdensome cost in the next decade.

I took time out one night recently to roll the pennies, nickels and dimes from my kids' piggy banks. I do this several times a year and deposit the money in their bank accounts. You'd be surprised at just how much you can collect if you contribute your loose pocket change to their "college funds" on a daily basis. I rolled 1,500 pennies, resulting in quite a hefty package I carried to the bank.

Liam, who doesn't quite have a grasp on the cost of living just yet (in some ways I envy that), asked if that was a lot of money. When I was six, $15 was considered a decent month's allowance, and could buy you pretty much any toy your heart desired.

Alas, that was then.

During our adventures in house hunting, we've all been somewhat overwhelmed by many aspects of finding that dream home.

Lexie, who's honed her skills as a bit of a drama queen, bursts with joy upon entering what she deems as "mansions." She pictures herself in new, large, well appointed bedrooms, running down the new hallways and eating at new, large kitchen tables. Liam simply darts and dashes through the homes, seemingly oblivious to aesthetics or practicalities. How his socks glide over the tile floors are paramount in his books.

Kim has found wonderful, bright kitchens and open concept living spaces. She's come close to the feeling you get when you know "it's the one."

I tend to take a practical approach to things, looking at cost, financing and any need for repairs or improvements. Kind of takes the fun out of it all.

The bottom line is $400,000 sure doesn't buy you what it used to. And real estate professionals know this all too well.

I'm sure to them, buying and selling houses is no different than cars, bikes or TVs. They're commodities, like anything else.

Yet we humans place a great deal of emphasis and emotional attachment on our bricks and mortar. We love to be surrounded by oak staircases, hardwood floors and cathedral ceilings. We do love our luxurious things.

So you can imagine how my sleepless nights have become even more restless lately. Assuming a mortgage on this scale, along with taxes, utilities and the like would make most people's heads spin. And when you're not wealthy or affluent, every penny counts. (Why do you think I roll them for my kids?)

Unfortunately for us, many friends and acquaintances not only own nice homes, but cottages or rural properties, too. They may have an SUV or luxury import in their driveway to boot. For me, this only compounds the pressure.

But as I watched Liam play by himself the other night, some things became clearer. Yes, he has more toys than either of us could count, yet he finds pleasure in the simplest exercises and by using his imagination, punctuated by his unique brand of sound effects.

And maybe my youngsters have insights beyond their years.

Lexie admitted she has enough clothes and jewellery (she has suddenly outgrown the toy phase). She listens as we try to explain the financial realities of the world.

And all Kyleigh wants is to be held, read to and tickled.

Going on a family bike ride and just hanging out with the kids means more to them than the benefits of any high-profile corporate job, new car or plasma TV. Chasing them to the point of laughter is more valuable than the prime interest rate.

They like to talk and hear stories from their parents and grandparents about their lives. They want to know why the sky is blue or what life was like before iPods. They want to see parents laugh, hug and kiss. They cherish family movie night above all else.

In our mad dash to accumulate wealth and things, do we forget about their basic, human needs? In our preoccupation with giving our kids everything, do we pay attention to who they are inside?

After rolling millions of of pennies and our kids go off to university, how will we feel, sitting in our empty mansions? Our expensive SUVs soon let go of the car seats and infant restraints. They are no longer filled with noisy rug-rats, once they sleep over with friends or begin to grow into young adults.

So, for 10 to 20 years we worry about food, clothing and shelter. And from then on, we continue to worry about our grown children and the choices they make. At that point, do we wish we had more money, or time?

I think I'll kiss each one of them on the head twice tonight before they go to bed.