Mark Pavilons
Acting, but not living

We are consumed by life, and often not really living.

Our dance cards are booked solid for months in advance. We encourage our children to engage in extracurricular activities and load them up so they’re not bored or idle. We shower them with toys and take-out, slowing creeping forward in our journey.

As Shakespeare once wrote, “all the world’s a stage, and all the men and women merely players ...”

And so we all play our parts, the roles we penned for ourselves.

We are often told to practise what we preach, and to be solid role models for our children. How often do we break this rule, falling into emotional and physical disrepair, for all the world to see?

I am often criticized by my best half for not following the words I write. I have some great ideas and nifty messages to impart to my faithful readers, and yet, when the daily costume is removed, I am just a bag of wind. I mean well, most of the time, and yet I don’t often excel at getting the message across to my precious cargo - my offspring.

Most of us working stiffs have it all wrong; backwards in fact. Shouldn’t we excel and sparkle on the home front, and leave the tedious monotony and our “lesser selves” for the workplace? Shouldn’t we be our best for our friends and family, exude joviality and lightheartedness in our loving home environment, leaving our cold, matter-of-fact faces for the job we do?

Yes, the world’s a stage and we are, for the most part, acting, not living.

Think about it. We are two (if not more) distinct people. When at work, during meetings, on the phone, etc. we exude professionalism; an amicable nature that’s appealing to all around us. We do this, not for the joy of acting or deceiving others, but because, for the most part, we have to. Let’s face it, there are few places of employment that allow you to walk around wearing flipflops, track pants, smoking a cigar and making all sorts of guttural sounds.

We do our jobs, make small talk and share tales big and small in the lunchroom or near the water cooler. Many of us don’t take the time to really get to know our co-workers.

When we return home, our mask is set aside, right next to our keys and cell phone. We become slightly more “human,” a bit drab, less funny and slightly less energetic.

Parents of young children don a different guise, one without the fancy cape and notoriety. We cook, clean, tighten skate laces, help tie karate belts and make sure the youngins are prepared for their activity de jour. It’s dark when we return home again. We then get everyone ready for bed, read a story and answer a few philosophical questions from the mouths of babes. (We have already covered why the sky is blue; how far away the sun is and why humans can’t breath under water.) If there’s any time left in the day, we tidy up, surf the Net and watch the news before retiring.

In all of this, very little of ourselves pokes through the layers of personal restraint and political correctness. We’re afraid to say what we feel. We’re afraid to lose our jobs. We try to be good parents, but then recall the last magazine article or Oprah show that informed us we’re doing it all wrong.

We try to earn a decent living for our families, and to prolong our multi-act performance. We try to live healthy lifestyles so our show doesn’t close prematurely. Some of us try to be open-minded and expand our horizons so we can make sense of it all, quietly of course.

When we’re not acting ourselves, we watch others do it. We must be the only species in the galaxy that glamorizes the fictitious depiction of our own kind. We are quite taken by watching actors do and say things we can’t or won’t. We become mesmerized by fellow humans who portray moms, dads, sisters, brothers, in real life dramas, yet faking it all for millions of dollars in bloated salaries and fame. It’s kind of crazy if you think about it.

Perhaps movies should be made of your life, or mine, and here’s a thought, let’s play the roles ourselves!

Maybe our lives are too mundane to even talk about. But if you ask me, it’s better to dwell on the here and now, the real and tangible, than sitting around a board room table, trying to find new and clever ways of draining our fellow men and women out of their hard-earned money.

Oh, sorry, that’s reality. We’re talking acting here.

We tolerate our young for their self-centred ways, yet won’t put up with it in adults. I think as we grow, we lose most of our truly innate human qualities. We’re transformed, by peer pressure and social “norms” and are assimilated. Resistance, it’s been said, is futile.

So, we all trudge merrily along in our gas-guzzling SUVs, out to the big box stores to acquire a load of junk that’s virtually meaningless yet satisfies us for the moment. Like sheep, we line up in grocery stores, at gas stations, ticket counters and fast-food outlets, and waiting for life-saving medical treatments.

Unless we live our lives to the fullest, save the planet on a daily basis and truly revel in our humanness, we’re not really alive. It’s also been said life is what you make it. That’s true to a certain extent, but the author of that sentiment likely didn’t have a huge mortgage, pay for cable or ever hear of an iPod. Well, we North Americans have made our collective beds, and we’re now not sleeping in them (due to stress induced insomnia of course).

All just an act?

We tout our freedoms and yet we’re not free at all. Few of us even exercise any of our democratic rights - we leave it up to opposition politicians, lobbyists and talk show hosts. Few of us

vote, or take an active interest in politics. Few of us understand or support our military and recognize the risks they take for us on a daily basis. Few of us return bad milk or call customer service when we’re wronged.

I’m not sure if modern society is a comedy or tragedy.

I happen to like those fresh characters, those who often take harsh criticism from others but are free and unhindered to do and think whatever they please. They’re loose cannons, obnoxious citizens who spout off before thinking things through. You know what, I find them utterly fascinating and refreshing. They are not acting, but living the part.

“The trouble with so many of us is that we underestimate the power of simplicity. We have a tendency it seems to over complicate our lives and forget what’s important and what’s not. We tend to mistake movement for achievement. We tend to focus on activities instead of results. And as the pace of life continues to race along in the outside world, we forget that we have the power to control our lives regardless of what’s going on outside.” - Robert Stuberg.

Tickets, for our personal stage performances, are free for the taking.

“I’d like to thank the Academy ...”